The Disaffected I

Definition of disaffected in English:adjective

Dissatisfied, especially with people in authority or a system of control:

Each of us is so weak that we revel in the notion of belonging to a group. A family, a gang, a charity, a nation, a religion, a consumer, a talker . . . the list is endless and greater than the number of participants; for each combination of participants is a unique cloud of association.

Each instance of belonging is a sliver of self denied. It may support the short term desires of the mind and body but it empties my soul.

So I am a disaffected animal, a disaffected vegan. What good does it do my soul to agree with other vegan consumers on how to sustain myself by consuming alternatives; Seeking support from other weak and disaffected creatures will at best insulate me from the spirit of life and eternal joy.

Swapping my bloody apron for a mantle of flowers and sunshine does not free me from my corporeal chain of destruction, yet this was and still is the purpose of my venture to undertake a vegan direction, to try and build a soul in the garden of the eternal spirit, not some ecologically sustainable lifestyle using the pretence that if I abstain from killing animals I have somehow reached a better position. A different position no doubt, that suits my cowardly heart but it does not change what I am.